Monday, April 3, 2023

Please Respond to This Survey About My Performance in Bed

In general, how did you find me as a sexual partner? Good? Come si, come ca? Or Bad? Was I attentive to your needs? Yes unusually. No selfish, but your zeal got me off anyway. Let’s just say it was "just a night." Would you recommend me to other partners? Would you tell others to steer clear? Or say try me out? What’s the worst that can happen? Run away? Run far away and never turn back? How was I the morning after? Did I make you feel that we had embarked on a voyage of discovery? Or did I make you feel like a whore who was used? Slam bam thank you madam or sir. How would you rate my powers of seduction? Once you had decided to go to bed with me on a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate the foreplay? Tongue refers to a language, a type of food and is also something that's used in the act of French kissing. When you left my apartment or I left yours, did I give the feeling I was going to call you again? Or was it apparent that I looked at the relationship as a one day stand? Did you see yourself one day saying, "I want to end the relationship?" Was it also obvious that now that I had gotten my rocks off, I had no intention of calling you for another date? Do you think that meeting me has been a positive addition to your life?  Or was it a traumatic experience that you will talk about in therapy for many years ahead? After you have answered these survey questions, will you be able to participate in a brief survey about the survey?

read "Sperm Count: What Turns You On?" by Francis Levy, HuffPost

and listen to "Modern Love" by David Bowie

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