Friday, May 15, 2020

The Final Solution: Return to the Planet of the Apes



Everyone is talking about normalcy, but when you consider the constellation of objects in the universe, a great deal is likely to be changed, once so-called everyday life is resumed. During the pandemic you may have engaged in therapy over a video conferencing medium like Zoom and when it becomes safe to go out, you may find yourself asking why not continue meeting electronically? Saves a subway, cab or bus trip and a helluva a lot of time. Regular doctors had already been experimenting with telemedicine before coronavirus. Perhaps some inventive person will come up with a way that dentists can treat cavities and even root canals remotely. Instead of going in for your six month prophylaxis with the hygienist, you will purchase a robot that sits in your bathroom and occasionally cleans your teeth, an oversized version of your current electronic mouth pick. Let’s say a tooth cleaning runs around $200. You could easily amortize the cost of a  dental hygienist over a reasonable period of time. And from the point of view of care providers, seeing pixilated forms of their patients is going to be a lot cheaper than paying the kind of expensive rents traditionally commanded by professional space. Office rents will spiral down along with the price of oil, which recently attained a negative per barrel value. You're likely never to meet a lawyer or accountant, though you'll probably end up paying the same fees. The gym is a no brainer when you have Peleton. Old-fashioned guys, remember the days when you rushed down to Brown’s Pharmacy to get a sneak peek at the latest Playboy centerfoldWell that’s a good metaphor for just about everything. You’ll neither need a place or a thing in the new post coronavirus world. Why go anywhere when the whole world's at your fingertips?

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