Thursday, May 10, 2018

Sperm Count: Lapdance Island

In a Times Sunday Business piece, "A Spy's Tale: The TV Prankster Who Says He Became a Double Agent," (NYT, 4/27/18) Barry Meier tells the story of a former television producer named Robert Moore (no relation to Roger one would suppose) who produced a “Candid Camera” type show “that conned the unsuspecting.” Eventually Moore fell upon hard times and went off to a life of corporate espionage but not before unleashing a series of spoofs that really seem like they would be ripe for a second life. “On one show,” Meier remarks, “politicians were tricked into campaigning against a street drug called ‘cake,’ which didn’t exist. On another program, men were fooled into auditioning for a ‘Survivor’-style show called ‘Lapdance Island’ supposedly set on an island inhabited by lapdancers." The fact that Moore didn’t achieve success with these gambits shouldn’t stop him from backtracking and making another mid-life change. Spying has only gotten him into trouble (he's become the subject of legal suits). Plainly his future lies in being a mixture of Jerry Springer and Allen Funt, who created the original “Candid Camera.” “Lapdance Island” may have been intended as put on, but it’s exactly what the public wants in our era where people are naming their newborn daughters Stormy and it isn’t farfetched to imagine Michael Avenatti as the dean of the Stormy Daniels Institute for Forensic Law. The reality TV show “Lapdance Island” could easily spawn a feature film and then a series of sequels “Lapdance Island” #1,#2, #3. “Lapdance Island #3” would naturally be followed by a Broadway musical of the same name with a musical score by Carole King and Frank Valli and a series of “Apprentices” produced by Donald Trump, of one-time presidential fame. Sometimes reality is stranger than fiction.

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