Eleemosynary Motors

Have you ever tried to get pro bono bodywork on your car? It’s a good question to bring up in the aftermath of a holiday weekend when there tend to be fender benders and worse. Have you ever gone to an automobile repair shop or dealership and thrown yourself on their mercy after you’ve had a fender bender? If you haven’t, it’s something you should try. This will in all likelihood be
the first time that the dealership or body shop will be providing an eleemosynary service. This is a potential selling point and something that can also be employed in purchasing a car. For instance try going into your local Ford or Toyota dealership and asking them to donate a car to you under the theory that they would be giving to a good cause. On the other end imagine starting a car dealership called simply Eleemosynary Motors which simply gives the latest model say Subaru away to those who want them. When you think about it, this is a truly revolutionary approach to car sales and servicing. The customer ends up being satisfied since he or she doesn’t have to pay. The dealer or body shop profits because it’s good for their reputation. Car dealers and repair shops are notorious for being mercenary and if people feel they will run into no chance of being take advantage of, they will flock to one with such a high minded purpose. The only problem with Eleemosynary Motors is that it's unlikely to turn a profit.

Car Talk Chat Room

Distributor Cap: “My brakes went out on my 2010 Prius here in Kabul where I’m stationed. I also had a little problem with my accelerator pedal sticking, but I hit a cadre of Taliban, which brought me to a firm stop in time to avoid getting ticketed for going through a red light. By the way, what’s GM going to do? If I were chairman of GM I would look into buying up the old Edsel from Ford.”

Suspension: Thanks Distributor Cap. I'm happy you were able to come to a full stop. I’m sorry if any Taliban got hurt, but it’s better than when jet engines run through flocks of them and the whole plane goes down. That’s what happened to Sully. By the way, if Sully could land that plane in the Hudson, he’d be the man to handle GM’s crash landing.

Carburetor: Hi guys. Thought I’d join in. I wanted to back up Suspension’s point. Some of these troubled automotive companies have to deplane.

Obama: Uh, hello. (Pause.) Just thought I’d say hello.

Distributor Cap: Hi Mr. President.

Carburetor: Hi Mr. President.

Suspension: Hi Mr. President.

Obama:. GM is a black hole that will suck up anything that gets in its way. We’re working on using GM as a weapon against the Chinese. Well, back to the Opel office.

Carburetor: I’d rather drive a cruller than a Toyota Corona. Touché Mr. President.

Distributor Cap: He’s a goner. Christ, I wanted to ask him about bringing Toyota and GM together. Those two’d be the Mercedes of automotive support groups.

Meineke Muffler: I think we should keep that amongst ourselves.