Crack It Up!

Have you seen the Golden Corral commercial? A diner carrying a plate comes to the table. He's bookended by a young girl who’s gotten just ham and an older woman with only a solitary piece of turkey on her plate. “With gravy” she adds thankfully. The first diner can’t believe his eyes. “It’s an all you can eat holiday buffet, a smorgasbord of all I want…did I sit at the wrong table?” But let’s say a Cultural Revolution occurs like the one in China where the intelligentsia was uprooted and sent to the countryside and diners who have quaffed down a big meal find they're able to apply a pea-sized amount of Lume to their butt cracks to avoid the smell from the consequent flatulence. The Lume advertisement pulls no punches getting right down to "business" like Digital Underground does in "the Burger King bathroom." But how are you even going to get to that holiday buffet if your car breaks down? That’s why you need CarShield, but listen as IceT chats with his old friend Ellis Williams aka Mr. Biggs. Says Mr. Biggs, “When I saw you represented Car Shield I knew CarShield was the real deal…” However, don’t take one step until you get Medicaid Part C or you’ve make sure you pay as little as $9.99 a month for life insurance so you don’t become like that neighbor who everyone thought was in good shape, but collapsed during the marathon.

read "Diasporic Dining: Fast Food Inc." by Francis Levy, HuffPost

and listen to "The Humpty Dance" by Digital Underground