Thursday, August 2, 2012

Sub Feces Aeternitatis

Why are feces considered bad? Why have they not participated in the sexual revolution? Why are they  not considered appropriate dinner conversation? Why are feces at the bottom of the food chain of bodily processes (when they are actually no worse than food), below burping, coughing, belching, even farting. Yes a fart is to a shit what Trotsky was to Lenin for those who are equally adverse to excrement and Communism. Why is shit diametrically opposed to the king of all bodily processes, mentation and eons from copulation (which has made great progress in coming out of the closet), even when it occurs in the orifice out of which shit resides? Must shit and love remain antonyms? You’re a piece of shit is widely looked at an insult, but if we change our view of this untouchable of bodily excretions (below sweat, semen and urine) it might be looked at as a form of flattery. Still considering shit’s bad name, proctology is not a field lacking in practitioners, although there are not too many movies where a blond blue eyed Cybill Shepherd type runs off with a Jewish proctologist. Proctology is a practical field of endeavor for a young Harvard med graduate and one which will guarantee plenty of patients, but it’s not exactly a glamour profession like neurology. Shit is dark and mysterious and emerges from the bowels of the body, the roaring Inferno of the G.I. tract. You would rather tell someone you were going out with a brain surgeon than a proctologist and you would rather brag about the size of your brain surgeon's member than the stool which you produced when your proctologist liberated you with Metamucil

1 comment:

  1. And though everyone knows Love has pitched his mansion (mansion mind you not a skimpy tent) in the place of excrement....


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