Tuesday, March 19, 2019

Pornosophy: What's the Difference Between Marriage and an Orgy?

When you think about it, what’s the difference between marriage and an orgy? Not much is the answer. First of all you’re naked with another person almost all of the time. Most people are so inured to the presence of their significant other, that they're like sleepwalkers who don’t realize how nasty and wild being married really can be. It makes the Spring Break movies seem like Mister Rogers' Neighborhood. Married people should realize that to use Hemingway’s words, they’re partaking of A Moveable Feast. You are seeing your husband or wife or whatever in all their states of undress. You’ve literally caught them with their pants down and that refers to bathroom matters too. Of course there are people who are squeamish, but when you inhabit the same bedroom, it’s unavoidable to see your John on the John or to see your John’s Johnson for that matter. And getting into bed at night is a form of licensed groping. In this day and age, it could be argued that unwanted kisses and embraces even in a marital context constitute a form of abuse, but most married couples either tacitly or expressly practice "affirmative consent" and hence allow themselves liberties they would never be granted in any other social situation. Wake up folks, marriage can be a cocktail between a wet dream and the best fantasy, a romance novelist ever invented. Just because there's no knight or princess in shining armor, sweeping you off your feet and taking possession of your soul, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t thrill with excitement when you hear the magic words for the umpteenth time, “honey I’m home and ready to rock.”

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