Extemporize Your Eulogy or Eclogue

The ability to extemporize is a gift, particularly when it relates to eulogies. You may have been invited to speak at a memorial service or even a graveside. If it’s a person of note  you’ll be part of a coven of friends and colleagues. Not to be humorous at the expense of…but how to eulogize a mortician?  If cremation or embalming are involved, you need to call upon someone who can speak to a particular skill set. Eulogies are similar to eclogues which Virgil was famous for. Should a eulogy be a hagiography or encomium? Premeditated eulogies tend to fall into the trap of idealization. On the other hand speaking from the heart may yield inadvertent hurts. When you’re standing at the edge of a grave, you see not only dirt but eternity. Write it all out and you don’t have to worry but when you look down at the coffin and realize Joe really died, you may find your mind drifting to how Joe behaved at his bachelor party 40 years when he almost ran off with a stripper. Alas poor Joe, he wasn't joking when he said, now that we've talked about me, let’s talk about me. So the next time you’re called on to deliver parting words, throw away that crumpled piece of paper you’ve stuck in your pocket and let the words fly.

read "Died Young" by Francis Levy, The Brooklyn Rail