Fearless Restraint

Part of the attraction of shock jocks is that they supposedly say what they think—what they think and everybody else is afraid to say. The rest of humanity is left in a purgatory  in which the movements of honesty versus civility compete for the attention of the humanist who seeks to do the right thing. You may have seen the advertisements for a new therapy app which allows you to carry on a text relationship with a therapist and for a generation weaned on value of expression, there are numerous outlets, including 12 step recovery programs and other support groups. On the other hand the self-same advocates of psychiatric intervention may very well find themselves in situations where the overarching need to get along with others in a spirit of compassion and love involve a certain degree of dissembling. Telling the truth in this context is not the only truth. You may hate someone one day, but discover that a tolerant attitude opens up doors that had previously been closed. It’s easy to look at those you dislike as enemies who you wish to defeat. It’s easy to hate someone of a different political persuasion. However, when they become objectified as an enemy, you never get the chance to see them in another light. That’s what happens during wartime and it’s what permits killing. The real question is how to reconcile the desire to speak the truth with the desire to break down the walls that exist between individuals. It’s a balancing act that depends on cultivating the seemingly contradictory quality of fearless restraint.