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illustration from the Kama Sutra |
The upsurge in terrorism and gun violence has affected the
usage of the term “blowjob.” Very few men of any orientation dare request one anymore. "Don’t ask for what you want for you may get it” goes the old saw. It
should be noted that hardly anyone either gay or straight has problems with
the notion of giving a blowjob since the giver has agency. You'd rather blow
someone up than be blown is the semantic logic that’s involved. But paranoia
has crept into the bedroom. Who knows if the person you have loved for
years is not a terrorist? You certainly
don’t want to encourage them by asking for it. Perhaps the arguing and
bickering that’s common among couples, in your case, was a sign of smoldering
hate that led to the clandestine radicalization of your partner. Thus history
has actually caused a change in the way we use language. Men who want blowjobs
now practice safe sex not only by wearing condoms, but by asking their partners
if they would like to administer fellatio to them or simply using the demotic "suck my dick." That way there's no chance they will be instructing some terrorist masquerading as a lover to use
explosives on them. Other men have resorted to more descriptive phrases like
“would you mind putting your mouth on my penis?” But if there's agreement
between the two partners (who happen to be adhering to the “affirmative consent”
statute passed recently in both California and New York) then in the event of consummation, the partner who has been the receiver of oral
sex must also be careful not to express their enthusiasm by saying “that blew my mind.”
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